About Us

Started as a retail manager who solved shrink, not flavor. One tragic Tuesday he clocked in with a gas-station latte and filed his first report: “Crime Scene: My Taste Buds.” Swore an oath to track roast curves like fingerprints and hasn’t let a bitter suspect escape since.

 

Former returns-desk legend who interrogated 10,000 receipts—then turned the lamp on bad coffee. Known to Mirandize every mug: “You have the right to remain delicious.” Confiscates weak brews on sight and issues a fresh cup as community service.